Teresa loves to embarrass. Especially people who take an interest in me.

We went to the mall today, meeting some friends. We went to eat and there was this guy there that apparently kept looking at me. I had my back towards him, but apparently he would look over to me and sometimes smile. Then Teresa or Melissa would look at him and he would look away very quickly.

I looked over at him a few times and he had his head down the whole time. Every once and a while Teresa would blurt out, “He’s doing it again.”

I would say, “Are you sure he isn’t looking at you?”

“Oh no. He’s looking at you.”

Then she continued to say that he wanted my vagina.

It didn’t happen for a few minutes and then Teresa said, “Okay, I’m about to just tell him ‘Hey! Mountain Dew dude, just talk to her!’”

I think he heard her. Nothing happened and when we were leaving, he watched after Melissa and then looked straight ahead, and then Teresa and I started laughing because she bumped into a chair, he looked over and just watched us.

We were leaving and we saw him in the parking lot. She claims to believe he was looking for us.

So, yes. My friends love to embarrass; whether it be me or someone who takes an interest in me is the question.

Maybe I'm meant to always be left. To be alone.

Here’s some advice:

Don’t get married to him. Keep the baby, but talk to your parents. I don’t know if they’ll let you back in, but no one says you can’t at least try. Your mom might want you back, because she really does seem to care about you.

I may not like you anymore because you’re a selfish, lying bitch, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want you to make the wrong decision. You lost your parents. You lost the two best friends that you ever had; we trusted you, we believed you, we didn’t stab your back like you did to us. You really don’t deserve to be treated the way you do, just because of this 40-year-old looking guy who you say is your “man.”

Look. You’ve made up your mind. But don’t stress yourself out because of all the negativity and regret. Tell us the truth. We won’t be back as friends and we may not help you with your baby, but we’ll talk. You do know she almost lost her baby girl because of the stress you put us through. You’re going to have that on your shoulders, your family on your back, your “man” at your feet, and a baby in your stomach.

Please. Don’t do this alone. Just go back and talk to your parents. He’s going to let you down. I don’t care if you’ve been talking about a wedding and getting married. It’s all dry promises. He’s going to break your heart and you’re going to be left with a baby you can’t support and out on your own.

Oh, and if this is one of your high school lies just to get attention, you are much more pathetic than I thought you were.

hey! where's the baby i had in april? oh yea. i didn't have one.
i know you're reading this, oh wise one that can see the future. so here's a message: man up.

I really dislike you. I hope you rot in Hell.

Gone

Sometimes shattered
Never open
Nothing matters
When you're broken
That was me whenever I was with you
Always ending
Always over
Back and forth, up and down like a rollercoaster
I am breaking
That habit
Today

You know you did it
I'm gone
To find someone to live for
In this world
There's no light at the end of the tunnel tonight
Just a bridge that I gotta burn
You were wrong
If you think you can walk right through my door
That is just so you
Coming back when I've finally moved on
I'm already gone

There is nothing you can say
Sorry doesn't cut it, babe
Take the hit and walk away
'Cause I'm gone
Doesn't matter what you do
It's what you did that's hurting you
All I needed was the truth
Now I'm gone

I don’t know what to think.